Thursday, September 10, 2009

Good Bye


Well sorry I haven't put up the pics yet, I can't find the cord to my camera. I'll have them up soon. I just wanted to thank everyone for their sweet comments, they really do help me. I read the most amazing words, they really lift me up. This week has probably been the hardest week I've had since losing Jackson. I have been more depressed then ever thought possible. I've come on this blog and vented enough though so i didn't want to get on here and be a downer for anybody else. I know some of my blog followers haven't had their babies yet, and they are scared to death. I don't want to freak them out anymore. This post is really just to let everyone know I don't think I'll be doing my blog any longer, besides the slide show and pictures I will be posting. I feel that Jackson's journey is over, and well as for Rob and I we have an extremely long rough road ahead of us, but we have to be ok. I don't want to depress people and I have no baby to update on now. I so very much wish that this blog wasn't ending and I had Jackson to update on, but the truth is I don't and it saddens me to get on her and write when i thought i would be writing about jackson Mac Beal forever on here. I love my baby boy and always will! He will always be in my heart, and I'll never forget the 10 most wonderful days of my life with my second born son baby jackson. He has touched so many people, and helped me understand how precious life really is. Jackson is my son, and unless you have lost a child nobody will ever understand the most awful pain that a person can mentally endure, but the pain is worth it just to have had Jackson for the 10 days that i did. I would go through my awful labor being care flighted, more labor, and then a c section again just to have those 10 days of my baby boy. I so wish it could have been forever but god had other plans. Thank you all for your support and kind words.
Candice Brooke